So I just got home from the special simulcast of Secret Church. I've got a 142-page notebook of truth and doctrine that is still blowing my mind. My plan is to make a study of it once I'm through the book of 1 John, so I'm sure there will be more posts about, but here's what I was thinking on the way home.
The beauty of the gospel is such that it does not fade or grow old with time. It is difficult to grow bored with the gospel. Rather, the more we gaze into it, the more we study its complexities and facets, the more we see exactly how much we do not understand. Instead of driving us away, however, this spurs us on in our desire to know God more.
I remember the first time I heard John Piper preach. I had the opportunity to attend Passion 2010 in Atlanta, Georgia, and Piper was one of the speakers. I had just gotten "legit" (as I like to put) it in October of 2009, and this was day 89 of my new life with Christ. I was (and still am in many ways) just a baby. I'd never heard of this view of God he was teaching. A self-centered, glory-concerned God just sounded awfully selfish to me. Wasn't He supposed to be about loving us, His creation? Wasn't He supposed to be about blessing me? My eyes were opened to the error of my thinking. God is about His own glory. Does He have this right? Umm...yes. He is the supreme sovereign God who created the universe; He can do what He wants.
I'd been doing okay this far into the conference, taking great notes in the sessions with Louie Giglio, Beth Moore, and Francis Chan (I kind of fell asleep during Andy Stanley's talk...ha.), but Piper blew me away. I just sat there in shock. I'd never heard this before and I was having difficulty processing. God was opening my baby Christian mind to huge truths that I wasn't ready for. He knew by showing me all this that it would give me a desire for more. And desire I did. When we met with our family groups afterward, I snapped out of shock and just wept. I don't understand. I want to understand was all I could say. I didn't have any spiritual teeth yet and God had just slapped me upside the head with a steak.
Since this experience, He has taught me more about Himself than I ever thought there was to know, and He just keeps going. Our God is unknowable, yet He invites us to know Him. Chew on that for a minute. We can never exhaust the depths of His character and attributes, yet we are blessed beyond measure when we spend time with Him.
Again, it's late. My brain is mush after tonight, so I apologize if this lacks sense in some places. Time for some sleep. There's more to come, you can be sure.
Hope you have a blessed day. =]
Showing posts with label growing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label growing. Show all posts
23 April 2011
14 January 2011
New Year, Old Lessons
I've started a new semester this week, which is a little overwhelming. There was snow (and it is still on the ground, actually) the first part of the week, so we didn't start classes until Wednesday. Spring semester always makes me twitchy for some reason. Though we've really only started winter, thoughts of springtime, sunshine, and flip-flops will start infiltrating my head in the next few weeks. After this semester, I'll be finished with English classes for the rest of my life-an exciting realization. I'm also a working girl this year, working the front desk of my dorm. I'll be looking forward to visits from my friends on the nights I work (hint, hint) as well as getting some homework done (ha-ha).
I am determined to be more focused this semester, more focused on my studies as well as my spiritual life. I'm a little over a year old now, and I've been facing some darkness lately that's spilled over from other areas of my life. I've been back in the States for about a week and a half after my first overseas trip. I learned a lot from the people in our city, and a lot about them. It was an eye-opening experience for sure. Not only that, but it was one of the most challenging. I'm learning an old lesson over and over-my joy and my strength must come from God alone. No human being-no matter how wonderful they are, how spiritual they are, how encouraging they are-can be the source of my happiness. It's so easy to have those friends from whom I draw strength and encouragement and to start relying on them to make me smile. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with being with people you love, but when all that falls apart, there's got to be a solid place to stand. So often, I forget this truth and put more effort into my relationships with certain people that I do into my (much more important) relationship with the One who is strength and love and grace and mercy. He is everything I need.
One of the most difficult things I experienced on this trip was losing my Bible. The morning we left our city had already been rough for me spiritually (among other things), and I spent the majority of the plane ride in tears, questioning God's plan in all of it. I was really struggling with some very personal things, and I felt He was not being fair to me. Distracted as I was with my little pity party, I failed to realize that I'd left my Bible on the plane until we'd gotten to our hotel and were preparing to go to lunch. I was already feeling a lot of pressure and stress simply from being tired, but at that moment, I felt I was drowning. It may sound silly, but I felt my Bible was the last thing I had to cling to. Human relationships were falling short of what I needed and God felt so far away. I broke down for fully twenty minutes before I could get myself off the floor and pull together. My Bible felt like the only thing keeping me afloat in all that was trying to draw me in over my head. I know this might sound silly to some. I do realize it's a material possession that is easily replaced, but this particular Bible contained all the notes I'd taken since I got legit. It was like losing my sword, feeling unprepared to go to battle, insufficiently protected against spiritual warfare. This was when I began to see exactly how true it was that I could not go this alone. I could not draw on the people around me; I needed Him so desperately. I'm a hard-headed person, so it often takes something drastic to get my attention. Mission accomplished, God. That's all I have to say about that.
The best part of the trip was getting to share my faith. This country's government has a reputation for being very closed to the gospel, but we were able to share more openly than I'd expected. We had a bit of a scare about a week into our stay, but God was faithful in protecting and comforting all of us, and me personally, despite my lack of faith. He remains faithful and sovereign. Always. Something that struck me was how blind these people are. In some cases, it's tradition or government or some other outside factor, but some have blinded themselves. A common answer to the question of beliefs is "I believe in myself," or "I don't believe anything." Having been raised in a Christian home and environment, I was dumbstruck by these statements. I honestly didn't know what to do with them. They believe nothing? How can you believe nothing? Being that it was Christmas time, we asked our friends about their festivals and shared a lot about our Christmas traditions, which opened the door to share the gospel. Many of them had never heard the Christmas story. As many times as I told the story, I never grew tired of it. I got to be the first to tell why we celebrate Christmas and to share with them that God is not the god of the West or the god or the East or the North or the South, but He is the God of the whole world and all its people.
And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled only to those who are perishing. In their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. For what we proclaim is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord... 2 Corinthians 4:3-5a
*pray for those blinded by the god of this world
*pray for students starting a new year
*pray for me as I learn (that I would actually learn and apply)
I am determined to be more focused this semester, more focused on my studies as well as my spiritual life. I'm a little over a year old now, and I've been facing some darkness lately that's spilled over from other areas of my life. I've been back in the States for about a week and a half after my first overseas trip. I learned a lot from the people in our city, and a lot about them. It was an eye-opening experience for sure. Not only that, but it was one of the most challenging. I'm learning an old lesson over and over-my joy and my strength must come from God alone. No human being-no matter how wonderful they are, how spiritual they are, how encouraging they are-can be the source of my happiness. It's so easy to have those friends from whom I draw strength and encouragement and to start relying on them to make me smile. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with being with people you love, but when all that falls apart, there's got to be a solid place to stand. So often, I forget this truth and put more effort into my relationships with certain people that I do into my (much more important) relationship with the One who is strength and love and grace and mercy. He is everything I need.
One of the most difficult things I experienced on this trip was losing my Bible. The morning we left our city had already been rough for me spiritually (among other things), and I spent the majority of the plane ride in tears, questioning God's plan in all of it. I was really struggling with some very personal things, and I felt He was not being fair to me. Distracted as I was with my little pity party, I failed to realize that I'd left my Bible on the plane until we'd gotten to our hotel and were preparing to go to lunch. I was already feeling a lot of pressure and stress simply from being tired, but at that moment, I felt I was drowning. It may sound silly, but I felt my Bible was the last thing I had to cling to. Human relationships were falling short of what I needed and God felt so far away. I broke down for fully twenty minutes before I could get myself off the floor and pull together. My Bible felt like the only thing keeping me afloat in all that was trying to draw me in over my head. I know this might sound silly to some. I do realize it's a material possession that is easily replaced, but this particular Bible contained all the notes I'd taken since I got legit. It was like losing my sword, feeling unprepared to go to battle, insufficiently protected against spiritual warfare. This was when I began to see exactly how true it was that I could not go this alone. I could not draw on the people around me; I needed Him so desperately. I'm a hard-headed person, so it often takes something drastic to get my attention. Mission accomplished, God. That's all I have to say about that.
The best part of the trip was getting to share my faith. This country's government has a reputation for being very closed to the gospel, but we were able to share more openly than I'd expected. We had a bit of a scare about a week into our stay, but God was faithful in protecting and comforting all of us, and me personally, despite my lack of faith. He remains faithful and sovereign. Always. Something that struck me was how blind these people are. In some cases, it's tradition or government or some other outside factor, but some have blinded themselves. A common answer to the question of beliefs is "I believe in myself," or "I don't believe anything." Having been raised in a Christian home and environment, I was dumbstruck by these statements. I honestly didn't know what to do with them. They believe nothing? How can you believe nothing? Being that it was Christmas time, we asked our friends about their festivals and shared a lot about our Christmas traditions, which opened the door to share the gospel. Many of them had never heard the Christmas story. As many times as I told the story, I never grew tired of it. I got to be the first to tell why we celebrate Christmas and to share with them that God is not the god of the West or the god or the East or the North or the South, but He is the God of the whole world and all its people.
And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled only to those who are perishing. In their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. For what we proclaim is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord... 2 Corinthians 4:3-5a
*pray for those blinded by the god of this world
*pray for students starting a new year
*pray for me as I learn (that I would actually learn and apply)
27 July 2010
Home Sweet Home
A little after eleven on Tuesday night, and I'm finally getting around to updating.
I spent the weekend with Rachel on the campus of Southern Seminary in Louisville before heading home on Sunday afternoon. Thus far my time home has consisted of appointment after appointment. I had my left knee and shoulder examined on Monday after getting a TDaP injection that morning in preparation for possible international travel over Christmas break. This morning was my first ever filling. Not gonna lie; I was not super excited about having a cavity in the first place, but fortunately it was not so deep as to require anesthetic, so no needles were involved.
I'm growing to enjoy my time at home more than I have in years past. I'm definitely the adventurer of the family, but it's nice to have a home base so to speak. Things went from tough to tougher for me during the last part of our week in Maysville/May's Lick. Distance from home and the familiar compounded by the rigors of a travelling camp forced me to slow down and seek the Lord's strength. I have this habit of wanting to do everything for myself; I see others as incompetent at times, and I stupidly tend to lump God in that category more often than not. How arrogant I am to think I've got a hold on everything! I come to Him as a penitent child, confessing that I've gotten too big for my britches on a daily if not hourly basis. When things fall apart I must admit my own inadequacy, yet He is gracious in welcoming me back.
My personal life is a little difficult and confusing right now. I've been greatly disappointed, but I will not be greatly shaken. My God has mercy, grace, love, and guidance. I'm learning again the pitfalls of self-sufficiency, but my God will lift my feet from the mire and set me on the Rock.
"...my God in His steadfast love will meet me...the Lord has become my stronghold and my God the rock of my refuge." Psalm 94
*Pray for rest for my fellow staff and me.
*Pray that the transition from camp to home and home to school will be smooth.
*Pray that I would learn to be less hard-headed.
I spent the weekend with Rachel on the campus of Southern Seminary in Louisville before heading home on Sunday afternoon. Thus far my time home has consisted of appointment after appointment. I had my left knee and shoulder examined on Monday after getting a TDaP injection that morning in preparation for possible international travel over Christmas break. This morning was my first ever filling. Not gonna lie; I was not super excited about having a cavity in the first place, but fortunately it was not so deep as to require anesthetic, so no needles were involved.
I'm growing to enjoy my time at home more than I have in years past. I'm definitely the adventurer of the family, but it's nice to have a home base so to speak. Things went from tough to tougher for me during the last part of our week in Maysville/May's Lick. Distance from home and the familiar compounded by the rigors of a travelling camp forced me to slow down and seek the Lord's strength. I have this habit of wanting to do everything for myself; I see others as incompetent at times, and I stupidly tend to lump God in that category more often than not. How arrogant I am to think I've got a hold on everything! I come to Him as a penitent child, confessing that I've gotten too big for my britches on a daily if not hourly basis. When things fall apart I must admit my own inadequacy, yet He is gracious in welcoming me back.
My personal life is a little difficult and confusing right now. I've been greatly disappointed, but I will not be greatly shaken. My God has mercy, grace, love, and guidance. I'm learning again the pitfalls of self-sufficiency, but my God will lift my feet from the mire and set me on the Rock.
"...my God in His steadfast love will meet me...the Lord has become my stronghold and my God the rock of my refuge." Psalm 94
*Pray for rest for my fellow staff and me.
*Pray that the transition from camp to home and home to school will be smooth.
*Pray that I would learn to be less hard-headed.
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